The Nehrig Family

Come on, baby! Come on...

2012-02-08T17:09:00.000-05:00

That it is all.

January 2012

2012-01-29T15:22:00.002-05:00

All of the griping, whining, and feeling discouraged- I take it all back! I know I thought the last 60+ months were difficult, but this? This waiting each week to hear from our agency that we've been matched with a sweet baby girl on the other side of the world, THIS is difficult.

Saturday, January 28th at 9:00 pm our time, the CCCAA reopened it's doors since closing on January 23 for the observance of Chinese New Year. Our prayer all day yesterday was that they (the CCCAA) would come back rejuvenated and ready to do some matching! Naturally, we prayed it in church today and naturally, I wept like a baby. I swear that adoption hormones are just as real as pregnancy hormones.

Please just continue to pray for us, for that precious baby so far away and for the folks in China to work quickly and efficiently. Any day now, Lord, any day now. :-)

Guess what's finally sinking in?

2011-12-11T17:11:00.004-05:00

Paul and I went to church today- our "home" church (which we haven't been to in a month of Sundays, and that's a story for another day). Aside from the awkwardness that exists when you go some place that used to be home and now you feel like a total stranger, I was overcome by a flood of emotions. I'm usually a bit emotional in church anyway. When the message is right and I'm feeling it in my bones it's not unusual for me to cry a bit. I made it through the service pretty well and returned to my seat after communion and proceeded to pray. I made it through my 'list' of usual prayers and began to ask God to bless and keep our daughter, as I always do, and the tears began to come. It's silly, but she's always been "real" in my heart, but now... now she's REAL. Somewhere in an orphanage there's a baby girl waiting for us to come get her. I guess it's the waiting part that made me teary. For so long we've been waiting for her, and now she's waiting on us. I wonder if God, who placed her in my heart so long ago, has placed us in her heart, too? Does she have a sense of peace and knowing that soon her family is coming to get her? I can't believe what a softie I am (those of you who really know me, know that's really who I am anyway). My eyes are filling up now just thinking about it again.
The conclusion I've come to, based on nothing but my faith, is that He must be watching over her and all the other little babies who have no momma to rock them tonight. For that and the innumerable gifts and blessing He has given us, I am thankful beyond measure. Our God is an awesome God.

Jeremiah 29:11
For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

You know what's worse than waiting 5 years?

2011-11-29T17:58:00.003-05:00

Waiting 3-6 months! I'm more impatient now than I've ever been. Think about it. Somewhere in China a child has been born and is waiting for all of this paperwork nonsense to be completed so we can bring her home. Amazing. My child has been born. ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE WORLD! Let the nesting begin, again.

I'm finding it very difficult to concentrate on much of anything else right now. Errant thoughts and questions keep popping into my head. What does she look like? What if she doesn't like us? What if she doesn't sleep? What if she's a picky eater? How many diapers do you need for two weeks? How much formula do you take with you? How long does that last? What's the best way to schlep your kid through international airport after airport? What if she cries the entire flight? What if she doesn't cry? Will she have a good sense of humor?

Glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel...

2011-09-05T17:03:00.002-04:00

We received word from our agency that our LID group is the next group to be matched with babies. We are cautiously optimistic at this point. I'm pretty sure I had lost faith that this would actually happen but now that it feels real again I can't wait. Our baby girl may have been born by now or is about to be born! Either way she's real again in my heart! Cross your fingers and pray without ceasing that if she is abandoned she's found quickly and loved and cared for until we can come and get her and bring her home.

60 Month Milestone

2011-08-16T05:44:00.002-04:00

60 months ago today our paperwork was logged in at the CCAA. Now, all we have to do is wait to be matched. How long could that take? We thought naively. :-) We're closer to our baby girl than ever before.

Milestones- real and imaginary

2011-07-26T16:37:00.005-04:00

Real milestone- as August draws near we are approaching our 60th month of waiting. Nothing new to report. Nothing new to say about it.

Imaginary milestone- I turned 40 this month. No big deal. I think I expected a big deal of some kind. I don't know. Didn't feel particularly older or wiser. I liken it to the phenomenon of wedding let down. Young women look forward to their wedding day with such enthusiasm and zeal that the actual day, although amazing and beautiful, can't possibly live up to the fantasy they've created in their head. Turning 40 was kind of like that which is weird because I didn't have any 40 fantasies. I just know that it wasn't at all what I thought it would be.

Summer time and the living is easy?

2011-05-23T20:21:00.003-04:00

Can't believe that summer is only a few days away. Looking around the homestead and making a list of all the things I'd like to get done this summer. Odd, some of those same items were on the list I made this time last year. Go figure. :)

On resentment and frustration

2011-04-21T17:34:00.004-04:00

I attended a baby shower for a dear friend (and had she not been my dear friend I would not have gone) this past weekend and while I was there a former colleague asked me where we were in the process and "Just how long have you been waiting?" This particular woman is a really sweet girl. In no way did she mean to intrude or pry. She was genuinely concerned and was around when we first began this process. The thing that really irked me, and maybe it shouldn't have, was when a total stranger inserted herself into the conversation and began to ask really personal questions: Why is it taking so long for you? I don't know. How long have you been waiting? 58 months. Why did you choose China? I've heard really bad things about them. We really felt like China was chosen for us and we did our research. China is still one of the most reputable countries from which to adopt. The questions continued and I politely but curtly answered them. I used to think I was pretty transparent- easy to read, but apparently not. This girl was not picking up what I was putting down. I had to simply walk away from her to get away from her.

Now, to be fair,I am extraordinarily sensitive about this topic and the longer we wait the more sensitive I become. Which brings me to the question: which is worse: asking about the adoption, talking about it all the time or not talking about it, not acknowledging that perhaps it's a little difficult for me to attend a baby shower, or celebrate a Mother's day. So, I'm bringing it here. Putting it down on the 'page' so that maybe I can actually put it down.

I resent the tiptoeing around. "Oh, be careful around, Lisa. Don't talk about babies with her." And, just to muddy the waters and set up a perfect paradox here, I also hate talking about other people's babies incessantly. It's a catch-22. I know it. Deal with it. I am.

I resent when people assume that they know what it is like to wait like this and I resent being reminded of Sarah and Abraham and how long they waited as if that is some sort of consolation.

I resent having to comfort someone else about my situation. Really? Don't wince at me when I answer your questions and give me that pitiful look.

I'm not feeling all that positive right now and guess what? If my ankles were swollen and my body was exhausted from carrying another human being we'd chalk that up to just pregnancy hormones and sensitivity. Instead, because I am waiting for a child halfway across the universe I think I'm supposed to make things easier for other folks, to suck it up. Get on with it. Be a good sport. Well, I don't want to suck it up. I'm tired of being a good sport. I'm frustrated. Angry. Sad. Irritated.

Instead of silently seething and not really hiding my feelings all that well, I've purged. It's out there. Done. However, I don't know if this is the last time I'll say these things, something tells me it won't be.

I would like to end on a positive note so I'll simply say that I've been blessed beyond my understanding with a husband who knows when to listen and when to advise, who is silently suffering right along side of me during all of this and who truly knows the way this feels. I'm forever grateful for my friend, Connie, who has perfect timing (because His time is perfect) and asked the right question at the right time. Thank you, Connie, for being such a blessing and a good listener. I'm really trying to lay this at His feet.

March 16 was 56 months.

2011-04-04T18:58:00.002-04:00

Nothing I could write now would NOT sound like a giant pity party. So, no post. Just the update.

Month 51 and Some Ramblings

2010-11-03T05:40:00.007-04:00

Been awhile since last I wrote. Haven't had much to say, in the way of the adoption, anyway. Those who know me, know I always have something to say :)

Wednesday, Nov. 3- we made the trip down to the area offices of immigration services and updated our 1-171H and were fingerprinted again. This renewal process secures the immigration status of an adopted child and ensures that upon arrival in the United States the abandoned orphan is declared a US citizen. Our appointment was at 8 and we were back in the car on our way home by 8:20. Is was great! We had a nice day together. Grabbed lunch, ate at a leisurely pace and then had dinner with my in-laws. It was a good day.

I'd like to think this is the last time we will do this...but we've been living this life for 51 months. I worry that I won't know how to live a life that isn't about waiting... what in the world am I going to do with a baby???? I'm sure I'll figure that out and I can name a few folks who would like nothing more than to tell me how to do it... solicited or not. But those of you who know me well, and love me anyway, know how well I take a lesson. ;)

I've been thinking a lot about the kind of young woman I hope our daughter grows up to be. Independent. Spirited. Intelligent. Kind. Willing and able to speak her mind. I hope she's able to draw boundaries so that no one, not a soul, treats her like a door mat. I want her to be able to say, "Mom, You're wrong and I disagree" when I am and she does. I want her to be able to follow her heart and not worry what the rest of the damn world thinks about it. I'd like her to be sensitive to others but not so sensitive herself. Sadly, I'd like her to know that there are some people, no matter how hard you try, who will never be satisfied. That might sound pessimistic but it's really not. Those people aren't worth her time. I also want her to know that no matter who it is... I will take down the person who tries to make her something she's not. So, enough said I suppose.

Month 49

2010-08-06T18:54:00.003-04:00

Today is Friday, August 6, 201o. August 16th will mark the 49th month anniversary of the log in of our dossier to China. Who knew then that we'd still be waiting and waiting? Tomorrow the social worker from AWAA will come and meet with us again to update our home study. While she is a lovely woman and we do enjoy visiting with her, I hope that this it the last visit of this kind. Of course once we have EG we will need to have post-placement follow ups, but I am really getting ahead of myself. On a side note- one of my former students said the sweetest thing to me yesterday. He said, "Hopefully by the new year you'll be Mama Nehrig instead of just plain ol' Nehrig."

Paul's new job has him SUPER busy and we haven't really had a chance to spend much real time together lately. I think once our interview is over we're going to just hang out in our backyard and float around the pool until we're all wrinkled!

Heard from our family coordinator today

2010-01-25T15:24:00.002-05:00

Hey ya'll...
Got word today from our family coordinator. We were told not to expect a referral at all this year either. The wait times and matching times keep extending and it's very doubtful that we'll receive a match this year. That's all the news you can use from this front.

Let's see...what's going on...

2010-01-11T19:13:00.002-05:00

It's been a few months since I last logged in and posted. What's happened... where to start, where to start. Thanksgiving found us in Tampa this year. We celebrated with my mom, step-dad, sister, the Boog (a.k.a. Devon) and my step-dad's daughter, her husband and their new baby. Nothing out of the ordinary really. It was nice.

December found us scrambling to make it to the winter vacation, or maybe that was just me! Those of you who keep close contact know that this year has been one of the toughest of my career. I spend all day trying to sell something that no one is interested in! That's hard.

We celebrated Christmas eve with Paul's mother and brothers. We missed his sister this year but she was working and being gainfully employed is super! We ate, exchanged stocking stuffers and headed to church for the 7:30 service. We used to go to the 11:00, but all of us used to be younger, too! Paul and I then headed down to Tampa so that we could be at my mother's on Christmas morning to watch the Boog open her presents and revel in the delightful treasures that Santa (who she doesn't even know) left for her under the tree. She was overwhelmed as usual and the whole experience left me thinking, "how in the world do you top that?" I fear we've set some dangerous precedents with this kid and Christmas. We all received a fabulous Christmas present this year. My mother's sister, my aunt Cheryl Ann, was able to join us this year. We were so glad to see her. She's been gone TOOOO long and hopefully will be making her way back to Florida, for good, soon! We miss her.

New Year's eve found us at Paul's father and step-mother's house. This is always a fun time. We gnosh on delicious goodies, laugh, and exchange gifts via a Chinese gift auction. It's so much fun to see what each package contains and who will end up with what at the end of the evening. I like to think that I got the best gift this year: A CLAPPER! Ohh.. .this is a sweet little gadget and I have joked about wanting/needing one for years and this year I scored! OOh.. what's that... too tired to roll over and turn out that light? No problem... clap on...clap off... the clapper!! I'm a simple woman really, with simple needs and who delights in simple pleasures. HAHA!

So now we're back in the swing of things at school. We've been back for one full week and this week is mid-term week. I'll spend my time preparing, administering and grading exams. Oh what fun and joy! The good news is that we will have a long weekend vacation coming up. We get Monday, Jan 18th off and Tuesday, Jan 19th is a teacher duty day. Should be most excellent.

And now for what you've been reading all of the previous drivel for... our agency released news that referrals for 3 babies were received on December 28th. This round of referrals finishes out the the dossiers logged in in March 2006. The next expected group was logged in April 6, 2006. The wait time still increases by one to 1 1/2 months each month, and the average now is 44-45 months. Who knows what that really means for us but by gum they are finished processing March referrals finally! Stay tuned for more as it becomes available.

Of Christmas letters and garage sales

2009-11-15T15:58:00.003-05:00

A few weeks ago I was shopping at our local Target when I rounded a corner and ran smack dab into a Christmas/Halloween display. I was on the phone with my sister and I remarked to her that at that precise moment my head literally imploded! While it was very disconcerting and I was even a little perturbed by the blatant commercialization of Christmas it did not stop me from buying my Christmas cards that night! I had to hold myself back and refrain from getting them ready to go that evening. So, as I sit here and contemplate getting my mailing list together and questioning how soon is too soon to send the cards I am also considering the inclusion of a Christmas letter. I think I may have done one before but I've always been a bit 'put off' by the letter writing process. I've just never seen us as Christmas letter people. Of course Paul could not care less and therefore he is no help. The question remains... letter or no letter. The internal debate continues.

To quote Monty Python, now for something completely different...

We had a garage sale yesterday. Let me preface this bit with the following statement: I LOATHE garage sales. I do not like other people picking over my junk and passing judgement on it. Now, you can tell me all day long that isn't the case, but you and I both know it is. People drive by and cast their disapproving stares in the direction of your former treasure turned junk. My in-laws joined us for the day and it was really nice.

We were following the advice of Dave Ramsey to sell everything...sell so much that the kids begin to think they're next! So we unloaded about 15 years worth of junk (hey, it's mine and I can call it junk!). It was a really successful day. We'll be sending a pretty respectable check off to American Express. We're on a course, slow moving as it may be, to retire all of our debt in the next 2 years. If there's one thing Paul and I are good at it's been eliminating debt and then recreating it! We're shooting for the elimination but not the recreation this time around.

It's been a conscious effort on our part to be better with money, both in how we handle it and how we think about it, so that we don't pass on any toxic money habits to our child. For my part, it's been about confronting the issues and dealing with them rather than hiding and fighting the urge to vomit when the subject comes up. I grew up in a house that was miserable when Dad would get out the adding machine and spreadsheet. Yes, a real adding machine and an old-fashioned spreadsheet, my father was a CPA. For as smart as my Dad was, and he was brilliant, he wasn't great with our family finances. Every bill paying session was one that found us on the brink of broke, or at least that is what he communicated to us, sometimes subtley and sometimes verbatim. So to say that I have money anxiety is a terrible understatement. I'm working on it though. The course we began, Financial Peace University, has been helpful in a lot of ways and off putting for me in others. I'm INTENSELY private about financial matters. I find it uncomfortable to discuss money with others, especially strangers, and while there's no real pressure to discuss your money in the class it was still very uncomfortable. Overall it's been an elightening program even though our attendance has been what you might call great. We have learned some valuable skills, however.

In addition to trying not to send Christmas cards too early I'm also trying to delay putting up our Christmas trees. I'm actually feeling like decorating this year, and I figure I should strike while the iron is hot considering for a few years we didn't even put up a tree at all. I've been thinking, which is always dangerous, that this really might be our last childless Christmas. I don't like to get my hopes up too high but it just might be it. Our wait will be 39 months tomorrow. We could be getting a call some time in April or May of 2010, dare I even think it.

So, until the next post...

Lisa

A much needed change and 38 months of the same...

2009-10-17T13:34:00.003-04:00

It's a BEAUTIFUL day in this steambath known as Florida. It's cool. There's a nice breeze. I got up this morning at 6:30 (on Saturday, no less) and opened all the windows in the house. It was still dark outside but my windows were wide open, much to my thin-blooded husband's dismay! We rented a steam cleaner and while I sit here and type this, Paul is cleaning our carpet. We're trying to prolong the life of the already 10 year old "stain resistant" berber. I figure we have until the first of the year until I can't stand looking at it any longer!

I was inspired by this beautiful day to do some much needed yucky tasks. I scrubbed our back french doors and the screen doors. Man, people who have come to visit have been awfully nice and haven't said anything about how filthy those doors were! Thank you. The dog got a nice visit to the groomers today. She was in need of a spa day. She's all pretty for her long weekend at her Nanny's.

Paul and I leave for Cedar Key on Thursday afternoon. We're going to spend the weekend there in celebration (although a weekend early) of our 15th wedding anniversary. We're really looking forward to this trip because we've never been when the weather was cool. This weekend is the big Cedar Key Seafood and Art festival so the place will be overrun with tourists. We've been told that next weekend the place is a ghost town. Just the way we like it! Hopefully we'll get some birding in and some nice long walks. I can't adequately express how much I need a mini-vacay from the job.

I talked to my niece today, well I talked and she listened really, but I miss that little booger. She's growing up so fast and I can't believe she'll be 3 in March. Our baby (yes, Kim, I said OUR baby ;) ) is almost 3... pretty soon she'll be going to college (Harvard, don't you know). I suppose that the only really good thing about this adoption taking so long is that Devon will be available for babysitting by the time our EG gets here! And I'm only partly kidding there, folks! Our adoption agency received referrals for 9 healthy babies ranging from 7-21 months this week. The families who received these referrals were logged in to the CCAA March 26 of 2006. Do the math (mainly because math was never my strong suit) and you'll figure out that we won't be hearing anything until March/April of 2010, which we knew but it still stinks. So, that's the update. The news from the front, if you will, and really what choice do you have reading this from wherever you are reading it... :)

Thanks for stopping in and I look forwarding to chatting with you all real soon.

Lisa

Happy Birthday, Paul!

2009-09-22T20:37:00.005-04:00

Tomorrow, Sept. 23, is Paul's 4oth birthday. Can you believe it? Paul is 40! It's hard to imagine that it's been 23 years since we met and began dating. When I think of Paul, especially around his birthday, I think of his Grandpa Harp as well. On his 80th birthday Grandpa Harp, who lost his parents at a young age, told a story about his promise to his parents, to always be a good boy, that he lived his life with that in mind. I remember how moved Paul was by that story and how he, too, has always tried to be a good boy. Interestingly enough it isn't something Paul must try to do (nor was it for Grandpa Harp, either). He is genuinely a good man. He's thoughtful, kind, loving, patient, generous and humble. The list goes on and on. I can't tell you how fortunate I am to have chosen so wisely all those years ago. Shoot when you're 15, you don't know a darn thing and while I might have had an inkling that he would turn out to be such a great man I was mostly just dazzled by how handsome he was, and is! :)

Even though I am terribly biased I believe we, who know and love him, are blessed to have him. So on September 23 I will say, as I do everyday, thanks be to God for this husband of mine, and thanks to his parents, for raising such a wonderful man. You did good!

Happy Birthday, Paul. I love you more than you can ever know.
Your wife,
Lisa

See two posts before...

2009-08-29T10:03:00.002-04:00

Our agency announced the referral of 7 healthy baby girls this week. It would seem that 7 is the magic number and it would seem that the time between referrals is about a month now. I don't know what that means for us exactly. We've been in this game for 36 months this month so perhaps we really are closing in on a date? Sometimes reporting this news feels like not really reporting anything at all. There you have it... :)

Love to you all,

Lisa and Paul

Enough already, Jon Gosselin

2009-07-28T18:48:00.003-04:00

I think that Jon Gosselin, of the now infamous Jon and Kate Plus 8, is in need of a PR consultant. Seriously, if he's got one they aren't doing their job. LAY LOW, you bonehead. Stay out of the limelight, stop catting around with 22 year old old floozies and have a little respect, if not for the mother of your children, then for your CHILDREN. Good grief.

He released a statement recently wherein he claims to be trying to lay low for the sake of his children who he fears will one day GOOGLE him and see the debauchery that has been his habit of late. YA THINK, Jon?

While I understand the difficulty of an impending divorce (yeah, it looks real difficult, partying on the French Riviera with a 22 year old girl) and there was a time when he might have had my sympathies but those days are over. The argument has been made that he was so young, 22 himself, when he and Kate married and he's making up for lost time. I would suggest that time wasn't lost... it was spent raising children. Also, should someone point out to Jon how ridiculous he looks so openly chasing after his lost youth? An earring. A young girl on his arm. A motorcycle. Parties in the Hamptons, and with French designer Christian Audigier and now Michael Lohan (that's an entirely different rant, folks). I hate to say it (no, no I don't) but Jon Gosselin, you are a cliche, pal.

Well... I've gotten that off my chest. For now. :)

News...of sorts

2009-07-23T13:20:00.002-04:00

Our agency just announced the referral of 7 healthy baby girls yesterday. The families who received these referrals have been waiting 40 months and were logged in to the CCAA on March 22, 2006. As you know we were logged into the the CCAA on August 16, 2006. That's the latest. Our family coordinator advised us at the end of 2008 that we shouldn't expect to hear anything until 2010 and that seems to be true, if then.

I would ask for your continued prayers. It's tough.

Each of you is a blessing to us and we value your love and support more than you will know.

Lisa

Grudges and stuff

2009-06-08T15:06:00.003-04:00

You know, what they say is true. Harboring a grudge, or hurt feelings, is really only punishment for yourself. I am certain that the person with whom I am angry has no idea and really wouldn't own their part of it anyway. So, why then do I find it so hard to let it go?

How do you find a way to love and accept people and all their warts when you're constantly smarting over their barbs? Prayer? I do a LOT of that. Forgiveness? Trying. It's tough though. I dunno.

Jon and Kate...

2009-05-25T19:24:00.002-04:00

I am, like so many folks, addicted to trash TV and magazines. I'm not proud of it, but it's a fact. There is nothing I want to see more than a good episode of the Real Housewives, or some other trashy Bravo network show.

My addiction to trash has taken a serious turn recently. I'm talking about the media frenzy that is Jon and Kate plus 8. I'm both saddened and sickened by what appears to be their marital problems. I keep thinking about those 8 precious children, and while I am sure that now they are very well insulated from the media hoopla that surrounds their parents, one day they will have access to this garbage. They will read about their father's alleged infidelity, their mother's controlling and domineering behavior. One day they'll know things about their parents that children simply shouldn't know.

It is too easy to blame their parents for this. Sure, Jon and Kate put their children on display for the world to see, and in doing so have left them all vulnerable to media scrutiny. I dare say that anyone I know wouldn't make the same choices that Jon and Kate have made. They have 8 mouths to feed. 8 college tuitions to prepare for. I would be hard pressed to turn down a paying gig that would help me feed my family. Who can blame them for answering the door when TLC came a'knockin'.

It's been interesting to watch the media coverage of this private (as if they will ever have a private life again) crisis. First, the allegations that Jon was having an affair with a younger woman. Then, the reports that it was Kate's controlling and demeaning treatment of Jon that made him step out. This one I love, blame the woman. If she'd been more understanding, more patient, and less controlling why this wouldn't have happened, if it did happen. It's ridiculous. Although I am guilty of thinking it myself. Why, if Kate was warmer and more loving to her husband, blah, blah, blah... Now, family members are crawling out of the woodwork with their individual stories of how the marriage was a sham for quite some time and essentially the couple have been estranged for months. I find this twist in the story especially interesting. No one on the outside of a marriage can accurately or fairly say what it's like.

The trash lover in me is titillated by all of this. Ooh.. who is at fault? Did he really have an affair? Did she? How could he stand to be treated the way she treats him? Ooh... enquiring minds, etc. But sadly, the show isn't called Jon and Kate. It's about a family and the all important +8, the folks who have the most to lose from all of this. My heart breaks for them and their parents. Marital strife is never easy. It's painful and devastating. I can only imagine how the media attention makes it all the more so.

Tonight when the season premieres I, like millions of others, will be watching to see if there's a crack in the facade. It's shameful, but I'll be doing it and all the while I'll be praying for those 8 gorgeous children, that their parents get their act together and do what's right for their family.
I'll be praying for them, all of them.

Furniture Shopping

2009-04-08T18:43:00.002-04:00

One chest of drawers- check
one armoire- check
one convertible crib- check...sort of

We schlepped down to IKEA on Monday morning with our dear friends Kevin and Susie. I had my print-outs. I did my research. I was prepared. I even checked online to make sure that what I wanted was actually in stock. It was, according to the internet gods. Come time to check out I go to the correct aisle and bin number, which in itself is a feat as there are NOOO customer service representatives at IKEA who can actually help you, and guess what? No convertible crib. They are out of stock. It would seem that the internet gods are liars! As an aside IKEA is so inexpensive (cheap sounds, well, cheap) because they don't pay people to help customers. It's ingenious really! Anyway back to the crisis at hand. No crib. If you know how long I had to psyche myself into actually making this purchase you would know how difficult it was not to leave the damn store with a crib.

Susie has a few things she needs to go back and pick up so we're going back tomorrow morning. I figure I'll check on line and see if they have restocked the crib. Again, according the to the internet they have them in stock. I call the store just to verify. Guess what?! Nope. No cribs and they don't know when they can expect to get them in. I looked at buying the item on line and having it shipped to us. That would eliminate this constant back and forth to south side of Orlando. The crib itself is priced at 139.00. Not bad. Shipping cost? Are you ready for this? 140.00! Yes as much to ship as the dang thing costs. I'm no rocket scientist folks, but even I know that's ridiculous. So we did some shopping on the good old fashioned babiesrus. Paul and I found one we liked more than the IKEA model for just a few bucks more and better still? Shipping is only 30 bucks! We did what any other thinking couple would do, no we didn't postpone buying a crib until we were certain we were getting our baby, are you nuts!?, we ordered the convertible crib for 159 from babiesrus and can expect it delivered to our doorstep in the next 6-10 days. Duh!

I know that my niece will sleep soundly in her crib away from home with she comes to visit Aunt Seesha and Uncle Po, and that one day sooner than later, our own dear daughter will rest just as easily. No thanks to IKEA! :)

What's new?

2009-03-30T17:30:00.004-04:00

Wouldn't you know it- nothing much! Month 31 went by without so much as a hoorah. There's not much to report these days. Our niece turned two on the 23rd this month. It's hard to believe that she's 2 already and might I add a little terrible, too. She's so big and so smart but I'm a little biased. She's turned into quite the little clown. She'll do almost anything for a laugh...hmmm, where does she get that I wonder? Devon's growing so fast she'll probably be old enough to babysit her cousin when we finally get Emma!

Paul and I are planning on keeping Devon for a week in July so that my sister's other childcare (that would be Devon's other grandmother, who despite raising a complete imbecile, Devon's sperm donor, is doing a wonderful job with Devon) can take a vacation. I am looking forward to that. Keeping her in July means that I need to go ahead and get a crib. She's much too big to sleep in the pack-n-play anymore so a crib it is. I used to want a really super nice crib that I priced at Babys-r-us and have come to realize that a crib is a crib and as long as it's safe then it'll do. So over the spring break Paul and I are schlepping out to the IKEA to pick up a crib that converts to a toddler bed, a wardrobe/armoire and a chest of drawers for the second bedroom. The only trepidation I have is in buying a crib. I know we'll need it when Devon comes but I have horrible visions of having this stinkin' crib and some God awful thing happens and I don't need it. Can anyone say pessimist?

I'm still working on staying positive. It's not too hard to do as I suffer from Scarlet O'Hara syndrome and always have. That is to say that I firmly believe in thinking about difficult things tomorrow.

Paul and I are off to New York for a few days in the near future and while it will be a working vacation it will be a vacation. It's a good chance for our us to get away from everything here and just enjoy the ride. I know he needs that and so do I. Hopefully I'll get some new pictures posted when we return. Ooohhh.... the anticipation must be killing you!

Peace and blessings,
Lisa

30 Months

2009-02-16T18:54:00.002-05:00

Today's the 30 month anniversary of our log-in date. In celebration of this momentous occasion we are going down to the USCIS offices on Saturday morning and waiting to have our fingerprints redone (third time) and our immigration paperwork updated. This little venture will allow us to keep current and would allow us to bring our daughter home with no hassles from the Department of Homeland Security and Immigration. Apparently, you don't ever want any hassles with the Dept. of Homeland Security, they might just Abu Ghraib your butt, or Gitmo you. :)

Not to burst any bubbles

2009-01-13T16:04:00.002-05:00

We heard from our family coordinator about this latest round of renewal paperwork. The news is a double-edged sword, folks. We were pretty much told not to expect a referral anytime in 2009. Remember my last post? About looking at the positive side? Well, I'm trying to do that with this bit of news also. There's something comforting in knowing that it won't be this year. I know that sounds crazy but the worst part of all of this is the disappointment and let down when we realize that yet again there's no referral for us. It alleviates the constant worry and waiting anxiety. This way we know. It's not this year. We won't be watching each month tick away and wonder could it be this month? In fact, this news really will allow us to reclaim our lives. We've sort of lived only half our lives. I know this doesn't make much sense but we've been living for an eventuality. Waiting for the next holiday because it will be better with Emma and we've not been taking the time to enjoy the here and now. I don't know how this happened to us, but it did. We're still 1Million % committed to growing our family but we're now also committed to enjoying our family as it is today. That's the news you can use from this end of the keyboard.

In an effort to capitalize on the positive...

2009-01-07T16:17:00.003-05:00

I don't generally make new year's resolutions, and this is not what this is... not really, but I've decided to take note of the positive things about our endless wait for word from China. So, to that end here are a few of the things i have enjoyed this year that i won't be able to enjoy once we have our daughter... 1) last night I sat my butt in my favorite chair and read Tori Spellings' trashy memoir cover to cover, uninterrupted no less. And it was Goooooood! 2) This past Saturday while Paul lay in a Nyquil induced coma I watched Bravo's marathon of The Real Housewives of New York, ALLLLL day! And it was gooooood! 3) Tonight, because I'm tired and he's tired and simply because we can, I'm going to our favorite Sushi restaurant for dinner. Spicy tuna roll here I come! 4) and sometime in February we're getting away for a few days just by ourselves. You've got to accentuate the positive.... you know the rest of the song! :)

Merry Christmas

2008-12-15T17:12:00.002-05:00

Merry Christmas friends and family! I am doing much better than last year in at least one area...Christmas cards are done and in the mail. Woohoo. I feel like that's a huge accomplishment since last year I couldn't even get motivated to do that. Still no tree and trimmings at our house. It just seems pointless. It's just Paul and I and we won't even be home very much over the holiday.

I was thinking about Mary and Joseph recently, go figure, and what those 9 months must have been like for them. Knowing that they were going to parent God's child surely tripled the anticipation of the arrival of their baby. I can only imagine. In a way, aren't all children God's children? Isn't it our greatest privilege to raise our children as though they are his? I dunno, sometimes I think I am thinking too much.

Just to update you as to where we stand in this marathon known as our adoption...
Our I-600A, immigration paper work for our hypothetical child, expires in February so that's another 850ish to Homeland Security. We've been informed by our agency that China has increased the orphanage donation fee from 3,500 to 5,500 due to the weak American dollar. And the rumor mill is rife with talk of the wait increasing to 5 years. 5 FREAKIN' YEARS! I suppose the good news is we're at the 28 month mark and how much longer could it be? Well it could be another FREAKIN' 28months that's how long! We know it's a marathon, not a sprint. It's about stamina and endurance and not instant gratification. Knowing all of that doesn't make it any easier just so you know. In fact, I cannot think of one pithy, cliche that could adequately express what this feels like at this point.

Nevertheless...Merry Christmas to you all and all our best wishes for a happy and healthy new year...love ya, mean it.
Lisa

26 Months and holding...

2008-10-19T19:32:00.003-04:00

Yesterday was our 26 month anniversary with the CCAA and they didn't even send a card! The nerve! :) There's nothing new to report. I suppose the old adage that no news is good news is only partially true in this case. We appreciate your continued thoughts and prayers as we continue to trust in Him. This is all in His hands.

Peace out!
Lisa and Paul

Hmmm

2008-09-23T12:28:00.000-04:00

Trust in the Lord with all your heart;do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do,and he will show you which path to take.
Proverbs 3:5-6 New Living Translation

Thursday, August 28, 2008

2008-08-28T20:08:00.002-04:00

Folks, this one has nothing to do with our baby girl, but it has everything to do with her future and the future of this country. I don't think I've ever been more proud of being an American than I am tonight. Tonight race, color, and creed don't matter. Integrity, hope, and courage do and aren't those the best qualities in each of us? When Barack Obama lays out his vision for the nation tonight we'll catch a glimpse of the best in each of us. I'm optimistic that we can turn this misguided ship around, that we can correct the mistakes of the last 8 years and show the world that conservatives don't have a corner on the market for family values and patriotism. We can take this country back, all of us, Americans. It's ours. So, as Pollyanna as it sounds.. I believe him when he says: Yes, WE Can!

Rain, Rain...

2008-08-20T13:49:00.004-04:00

You know the rest!

Day two of Tropical Storm Fay and still it's more an inconvenience than anything else. A little rain, a little wind and two vacation days. I hope that this posting finds all of you well.

So, as you already know we've had our home study rewritten to include twins or siblings and now it's all I can think about. Obsessive much? Two babies, one trip. Mind you I'm not getting my hopes up too much but c'mon... TWO BABIES!!! How cool would that be? Paul and I were having an what-if conversation on Sunday and we started talking baby names again. Of course our Emma Grace is not changing, but we were thinking about hypothetical Baby Two... Paul asked so innocently, "gosh, what would we name a second baby?" as if I hadn't already thought of that! ;-) So we chatted a bit and the name of HBT, is...drum roll... Baylor Holland! He or She can be their own law firm.. .Baylor Holland and Nehrig! Now before you go jumping to conclusions about how far gone I am about this second baby idea, please know that I know how unlikely this scenario is... but it's good to be optimistic. So, that's all the news on this front for now. We're back on the roller coaster and right now we're loving the ride. It's getting exciting again as we get closer and closer to meeting our daughter (or daughters).

Nehrig Home Study- Redux

2008-07-27T12:47:00.002-04:00

The visit with our social worker went well. She posed some really interesting and thought-provoking questions for us to consider. We're going to rewrite our home study to include approval for a sibling group or twins. This doesn't change our status in China. What it does do, however, is create a greater casting net for us, if you will. Paul has been gung-ho on the idea of twins since the day we attended the initial seminar. It's such a rarity in Chinese adoptions, but it does happen and this rewrite would allow us to be able to do that. We're also considering the waiting child program, which was formerly known as Special Needs adoptions. Special needs are defined on almost an individiual basis and it's hard to pin down what that might mean. Our agency does allow you a checklist (sounds strange putting it that way) for couples to indicate which special needs they are the most comfortable with or prepared to handle. I'm not sure what we're up for but we're praying on it and asking for God's guidance. As crazy as it sounds to some, God spoke to me once about this adoption and I know he'll let me know what I'm supposed to do with this decision. People who have biological children don't get the luxury of deciding what they will or will not be up for... so I sort of think this decision is a real blessing and if we've been blessed aren't we supposed to share those blessings?

Nehrig Homestudy....take duex! :)

2008-07-26T10:26:00.002-04:00

Today's the day, folks. Despite knowing that no social worker is going to give us a 'white glove' test on the baseboards and cabinets I have been cleaning (probably out of anxious energy more than anything else) like a whirling dervish(?). Our social worker is coming at 11, in less than 30 minutes, and Paul is still outside mowing the lawn. ARGH! I wish he was in and already showered. Oh well. C'est la vie.

As some of you may know I am considering getting involved in the distribution of Mona Vie, a fruit juice essentially. I'm still on the fence about this one. The plan makes sense but... there's always a but isn't there... I can't get two words out of my mind... PYRAMID SCHEME. So I'm still deliberating. The only reason I'm involved at all is that I have seen real improvement in my skin since I've been drinking the stuff. I'm thinking I'll join just to buy the stuff for myself at a discounted rate. I'm vascillating. I know. Oh well. Gotta get off of this thing and fluff a few pillows and stuff. More when the visit is over.

Lisa

WOOOHOOO! We've got another home study update...

2008-07-06T17:53:00.000-04:00

While we were away our social worker contacted us and is ready to set a date for our home study update. This will be the second time we've done that. A homestudy is good for one calendar year. I'm hoping against all hope that this will be the last time and as we approach 23 months this month that we're closing in on the date of our referral. I can't help but get excited despite my general personality type which is to NOT get too excited about much. I have deep fantasies about traveling to China in December or January but I know most likely that it will be later in '09 before we travel. A girl can dream right? :)

Now for something completely different... we are back from Cedar Key (our own little paradise) and boy was it just what we needed. For the past 6 years my relentless husband has tried to get me out on a kayak or canoe in the middle of the GULF!! I have resisted pretty successfully until this year. I gave in. On Saturday morning at 0800 hours (how's that for militaristic?) we set out across the Gulf of Mexico to explore the outer islands. We paddled and paddled and paddled and I only hyperventilated once or twice. It was so peaceful and so quiet that I am truly glad I did it. There's something really soul soothing about being out there on the water, just you and the birds, dolphin (which we did not see) and the sea turtles (which we did see). We canoed around the entire Atsenie Otie Key and back again in about 2 hours. It was amazing. I'd say I paddled my ass off but my ass had nothing to do with it! My left arm and shoulder however, that's another story. Can you say advil? Despite my initial trepidation we are seriously considering getting our own kayak. I KNOW! IT'S CRAZY! But it is good exercise and it is an awful lot of fun!

So that's the news you can use from our little part of the world... to be sure I'll update again after our home study update. I'm really looking forward to that. :)
Peace and Blessings,

Lisa

V-A-C-Ation...

2008-06-29T18:26:00.000-04:00

It's June 29th... for many of you that means absolutely nothing, but for Paul and me it means we're sooooo very close to our 4th of July traditional vacation in Cedar Key. This time of year is what sustains us throughout the rest of the year. In the middle of FCAT season, or the middle of a particularly hairy week at work we'll look at each other, sigh and say... Ahh... Cedar Key. We get to do nothing at all, which for me isn't all that hard, but for Paul is darn near impossible. He is who the phrase "works like a dog" was invented for. What started out as a way for us to carve out some "US" time, as an attempt to establish some of our own traditions away from our parents, has become a blissful, priceless escape. It's peaceful. It's private. It's just for us. We still have a few family members who have a hard time understanding why we continue this trip. I don't understand this at all. We love this place so much that we book the next year's stay when we arrive!
So to those of you who we will not see on the 4th of July, which by the way is everyone, Happy 4th of July! May your hamburgers be done to your liking, your watermelon cold and seedless, your fireworks fabulous! We're off to lolling around in our pajamas all day if we choose, early morning and late afternoon walks around the island, devouring stacks of neglected reading material, bird watching, and fireworks enjoyed from the comfort of our bed over the gulf of Mexico. Yeah, it's hard to believe that we wouldn't want to give this up. NOT... :) Happy 4th of July!

Almost 22 months...

2008-06-04T12:57:00.000-04:00

What's the longest gestational period of any mammal? I think it's the elephant and I think it's something like I orignally said 15 months but the elephant does in fact carry it's young for 24 months. SO I have not been paper pregnant longer than an elephant BUT almost and doesn't that count for something? :) Lisa and Paul

LID anniversary # 19

2008-03-17T15:50:00.000-04:00

It's hard to believe it's been 19 months since we were logged in to the CCAA. Amazing about how time flies, but I'd be lying if I said it's flown by and we've hardly noticed because we have. Each month without word, each update that suggests the wait is extending by months every month, every time we have to say to some well wisher, "no, we haven't heard anything yet" and each time we smile and encourage them that it's ok and reassure them that we're ok with it has been excruciatingly difficult.

I'd be lying if I said that every day of the last 19 months I've been 100% certain that God's timing was perfect and that every thing happens, or doesn't, for a reason, because I haven't been. This truly is the most difficult thing I've ever done. While I will never know what it's like to carry a child, and wait the 9 months for his/her birth I certainly do understand waiting, preparation, and the emotional highs and lows of expecting.

But, I do remain faithful and I do have LOTS of conversations with God. I do have assurance that this is in fact happening for reasons that I may never understand, but He does and that's comforting.

So... Father God, bless our daughter, that she be born healthy. Bless her mother, that she know peace and serenity in her decision. Bless all whose hands are in this process, that they have efficiency and expediency of task and Bless our family, as they wait with us, expectantly, patiently and lovingly. Amen.

Lisa

Welcome to our blog...

2008-03-12T17:15:00.000-04:00

Welcome to our blog home! We've waited a long time to start this because frankly, we've been waiting a long time for our daughter. On March 16 we will have been waiting officially for 19 months. All projections and speculation point to a 22 to 24 month wait from the time of dossier log in. So we're extremely hopeful that we'll receive word about our daughter by Christmas.

We plan on using this blog as a means to communicate with our friends and family. There are lots of other sites out there that specialize in hosting adoptive families but honestly we're low budget folks. :)

As many of you already know we've been preparing our hearts and our home for this child for many years now. Paul and I have taken a faith walk on this as we feel truly led by God. We believe that our daughter is in China. It's always been a matter of going to get her. We know that the details are in God's plan for us and our child and we trust that it His hand will continue to guide us and provide for us.

So, please join us on this journey. Drop in. Leave a note. We're glad you're here and we're glad to share.

In His name,
Paul and Lisa Nehrig